How to Deepthroat: Important Tips and Techniques

Let’s be real — deepthroating looks intense. The watering eyes, the sounds, the hair-grabbing moment — it’s a lot. But here’s the secret: anyone can learn it. You don’t need a pornstar throat or a missing gag reflex — just the right mindset, some practice, and plenty of lube.

If you’ve ever thought, “There’s no way that’s fitting in there,” this guide is for you. By the end, you’ll know how to breathe, relax, and control your gag reflex so you can deepthroat like a pro — no tears, no panic, no giving up halfway through.

What Is Deepthroating, Actually? 

Despite what porn might make it look like, deepthroating isn’t about jamming a penis down your throat and praying for mercy. It simply means taking your partner’s penis deeper — past your mouth, into your throat — even a little bit counts!

You’re not aiming for Olympic gold in “depth.” You’re aiming for rhythm, control, and relaxation.

And yes, you can practice. You can start with a dildo, curved toy, or even a banana (we’ll get to that).

Mind Over Matter

The biggest part of deepthroating isn’t physical — it’s mental. Your gag reflex is your throat saying, “Hey, what’s happening?!” So the trick is to calm it down.

Start by practicing with something smaller than your partner — a dildo or curved toy is perfect. Get it slick with flavored lube, take a few deep breaths, and start slow.

Don’t rush. Go a little deeper each time, then pull back out. Focus on relaxing your throat, flattening your tongue, and breathing through your nose. 

Remember, you’re not forcing anything — you’re training your body to trust you. 

Fruits Are Good For You

It sounds silly, but bananas are a classic for a reason. They’re soft, curved, and about the same width as many penises — perfect for practice. Always keep the peel on so it doesn’t fall apart, and go slow.

Once you’ve gotten used to the motion, try something more lifelike — a silicone dildo with a defined head and realistic shape. That way, you can get used to how a penis actually feels as you train your throat. Start with one around 6–7 inches long, flexible, and easy to hold.

Think of this as strength training for your throat — you’re conditioning, not racing.

Getting to Know Your Toy (or Banana)

Before you attempt a full deepthroat, you need to get comfortable with what’s in front of you.

Start by getting yourself in the mood — when you’re turned on, your throat naturally relaxes and your reflexes ease up. Then, treat it just like you would your partner: lick the tip, suck the sides, swirl your tongue, and get it nice and wet with saliva or lube.

When you’re ready, take it in a little at a time — down, then back up. Don’t force it or rush. Each pass, go just a bit deeper, focusing on relaxing your tongue and breathing through your nose. If you feel the urge to gag, pause, exhale, and try again.

The slicker everything is, the smoother it’ll go. Use a flavored lube to keep things fun and tasty — a sweet strawberry lube like the one below adds just the right amount of flavor and glide. 

If you normally kneel or lie down while giving oral, practice that same way. Getting your body used to the position you’ll actually be in helps your throat and breathing fall into rhythm more naturally.

Stay Relaxed, Show Up With Confidence

Relaxation is everything. When your jaw and throat tense up, the toy won’t move — and you’ll trigger your gag reflex.

Keep the toy moving slowly in and out until you feel it touch your tonsils. That’s the threshold — and once you pass it, you’ll feel the toy slide deeper much more easily.

Breathe through your nose as it goes down, exhale as you pull it out. Over time, you’ll be able to keep it there longer without discomfort.

It might take a few sessions to hit your stride — that’s okay. The more you practice, the better your control becomes.

2 Tricks of the Trade:

• Tilt Your Head Back

• Remember To Breathe

Getting Over the Gag

If you gag easily, you’re not broken — you’re human. That reflex is your body’s built-in safety alarm, and it can be trained with time and patience.

Keep practicing with your toy until your body stops panicking. Stay calm, keep breathing, and never force anything.

The more turned on you are, the more relaxed your throat will be. Arousal naturally suppresses your gag reflex — so add a little fantasy or vibration while you practice if it helps.

You can also use a desensitizing throat spray (like Good Head Deep Throat Spray) to help take the edge off while you build your confidence.

Time to Trade Out The Toys

Once you’re confident with toys, you’re ready for the real thing.

Before you begin, gently remind your partner that you’re in control. No pushing your head down, no hair-grabbing — that only comes after you’ve mastered the technique.

Begin by kissing, licking, and teasing their shaft. Add saliva for slickness, use your hands for stimulation, and take them into your mouth slowly. When you’re ready, start to take them deeper, just like you practiced — inch by inch, at your pace.

Pull back, breathe, go again. Remember: this isn’t about perfection — it’s about sensation and control. Even partial deep throating feels incredible for them.

And when you pull back? Add suction. That little detail drives them absolutely wild.

Tongue Twisting Techniques

Once you’ve learned the basics, try these two bonus moves to make your deepthroat sessions unforgettable:

• The Humming Technique

• The Popping Technique 

Build a Better Blowjob

Once you get the hang of deepthroating — even if it’s just partial depth — you can start layering in techniques to make the entire blowjob feel incredible for your partner. There’s no single “right” way to do it. The magic is in variety, rhythm, and staying relaxed.

A few things that make a huge difference:

• Relax your throat + tilt your head back 

• Switch it up if you get tired 

• Use your hands like an extension of your mouth

• Add teasing — it goes farther than you think 

• Show love to the head 

• Follow your own rhythm 

At the end of the day, the goal isn’t perfection — it’s sensation.
Do what feels natural, stay relaxed, and build a rhythm that turns you on too. That’s when the whole experience becomes next-level for both of you.

Your Treat For a "Job" Well Done

If you’re going to give your partner the world’s best blowjob, take it all the way! Swallowing after deepthroating actually makes it easier — the cum goes straight down your throat, bypassing your tongue and taste buds.

If taste is a hang-up, flavored lubes or arousal gels can help make the finish sweeter.

Is swallowing necessary? Of course not. But if you like the feeling of control and completion, it can be incredibly hot

Final Thoughts

Deepthroating is one of the most intense, erotic experiences you can share with a partner — but it’s not a race or a performance.
If you don’t get it right away, that’s totally fine. Every attempt builds confidence, and your partner will be thrilled you’re trying.

With practice, patience, and pleasure as your goal, you’ll master it — and enjoy every step along the way.

Keep breathing, stay relaxed, and remember: half the fun is in the trying.