Back to the basics: Beginner BJ tips that always work

Think you don’t need a how-to blowjob guide? Think again. Whether you are new to the BJ game or a certified Head Expert, you can never know too much! Check out this article to read the essentials; maybe you will learn something new!

Blow Job Definition: oral sex performed on a partner with a penis, where the penis is put into the partner's mouth and stimulated via the mouth, hands, tongue, and throat to arousal and orgasm.

1. START SLOW

Learning how to give a blowjob for beginners is easy as long as you’re willing to learn and have a good blowjob guide. Whether this is your first time playing with your lover’s favorite pal, or the 100th time, it is essential to take a moment to savor the look and feel of your partner’s penis BEFORE your mouth ever touches it! Stroke it slowly from base to tip. Run your finger over the head. If the penis has a foreskin, gently stroke the foreskin down so the head becomes exposed. Don’t just shove it in your mouth (at least not every time). Take a few precious seconds to admire your partner’s penis before slowly putting it into your mouth.

2. GENTLE SUCKING

Despite what you may have seen in an adult feature, blowjobs are not all “rough and aggressive.” Our top blowjob guide tip: starting with very vigorous stroking and deepthroating is not always the way to go. No, to truly learn how to give a blowjob properly, you want to go back to the basics and tease your partner by sucking gently. Take the penis and slowly pull it into your throat while allowing the moisture and heat of your mouth to stimulate. Spend some time running your tongue around the penis while it’s in your mouth. Grab the base of the penis and give a little squeeze. Move your lips and mouth up and down the shaft ever so slowly — there will be time to pick up the pace later — and just let your partner adjust to the wonderful feeling of YOUR mouth.

3. TONGUE TRICKS

This wouldn’t be a complete blowjob guide if we didn’t focus on some tongue-play. The tongue feels amazing on a sensitive shaft, like tiny fingers touching all over. Wrapping your tongue around the shaft in conjunction with sucking can drive your lover crazy! Not to mention, you can “fake” a deepthroating feeling by sticking your tongue on the roof of your mouth and allowing the penis to hit your tongue. The most important thing to remember about the tongue is variety! Make sure your tongue is always moving, circling around the shaft, glazing over the head, and even literally licking up and down while your lover’s penis is not actually in your mouth.

4. HELPING HANDS

Just because oral sex is primarily done with the mouth does not mean that you cannot use your hands – YOU NEED TO! When you’re learning how to give a blowjob for beginners or pros, remember that the more stimulation, the better! Using your hands will accomplish two things: (1) it gives the entire penis and shaft the stimulation it desires (2) it allows you to rest your mouth in between the sucking. There are so many variations of hand play during a blowjob that you can continually surprise your lover with. However, here is a tried and true favorite. Get your partner’s penis all slick and lubed up with your spit or flavored lubricant. Make sure you are really using your saliva to make it slippery. Then, take the tip and a bit of the head into your mouth and suck, meanwhile wrap one of your hands around his shaft and twist around back and forth while moving your hand up and down the shaft while continuing the sucking motion. This is going to give him the absolute best and most thorough sensation. You can vary the depth of your sucking and the speed and direction of the hand motion, but the key is constant stimulation!

5. SPEED IT UP

While I started this blowjob guide advising not starting your oral affair with aggressive or fast-paced moves, toward the middle-to-end of your oral loving time you will want to add a little speed and more pressure to the game. This is where deepthroating (if you can do it) would be the ideal activity. You want to give your lover some rapid stimulation by either (a) allowing your partner to thrust INTO your mouth OR (b) take the lead and slide the penis as far into your mouth and as fast as you can, while also remembering to use your tongue and your hands. It may seem overwhelming while reading this, but trust me, in the moment — it will fall into place! If you’re a beginner, accelerate slowly when learning how to give a blowjob at a faster rate.

6. ENTHUSIASM WILL WIN YOU POINTS

Your technique is important, but it’s not the end-all and be-all of my blowjob guide. Blowjobs are VERY personal and intimate and can be extremely exciting, but if the giver doesn't have enthusiasm, it will be much less enjoyable. The sexiest thing is to KNOW that your partner is loving what they are doing. This means, make noises — little moans are very hot. Talk a little dirty, perhaps about how your partner’s penis feels sliding down your throat. LOOK UP AT YOUR LOVER — this will drive your partner crazy! Nothing is more erotic than looking down and meeting your partner’s eyes while their mouth is on your penis! Enjoy what you are doing and BOTH of you will enjoy it!

Mikayla’s Tip: Word to the wise, if you are a beginner learning how to give a blowjob, take the time to get comfortable with it. Oral sex is a skill — yes, I said it, a skill — and you can’t be fantastic right out of the gate. So, take the time to try out our blowjob guide tips and become comfortable with it, as I am sure you will find oral sex is an important and intimate part of a healthy sexual relationship.

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