Is It Possible to Have a Strictly Sexual Relationship? No Strings Attached?
Friends with benefits. No strings attached (NSA). Sex without commitment. Casual sex. There are so many different terms for the same concept: sex without monogamy, restraint, or restriction of any kind - except for the necessary consent of course. Some people think that casual sex sounds like a wonderful non-relationship style of connection to have. There are the benefits of having sex without the potential hang-ups of emotional connection and aligning mutual life plans.
Casual sex can allow you to explore your life without the extra factors that a significant other can bring to the table. Others might think that this “refusal” to commit is horrible, and they might wonder why anyone would want to try to have or explore this type of relationship.
They’re probably asking, “What’s the point if you don’t have feelings or never want to be serious eventually? We all might be curious whether this type of relationship is really possible. We want to help by digging into a few points that might help everyone discover the answer for themselves.
Pros & Cons To No Strings Attached Sex
Now, when it comes to the topic of NSA sex-based relationships, the pros and cons will actually likely be vastly different according to your own relationship style preferences and your sexual identity. This is primarily because both romantics and aromantics exist in the same environments with very different approaches to relationships and life. It happens.
This difference in approach is why communication is so important when you open yourself to creating any connection. But, let us say that there is at least one upside to NSA that even long-time romantic love birds can agree on (even if only joking out loud with their respective friends). When you play without strings, one can experience all the sexual release without the endless fighting about taking out the garbage.
All right, let’s take a look at some other reasons that a no strings attached relationship can be desirable as well as why there can be drawbacks.
When You're Just Not Looking For Something Serious
While it can be challenging to relate to for some, a variety of different people experience different levels of need in their lives for various things. Relationships are just one of those things that some people choose not to focus on, or they may simply have no interest in romantic relationships.
This doesn’t mean that sex is off the table for them - it just means they have to know how to communicate that they have only physical intentions, so they don’t lead people on accidentally. It also helps to learn how to find a variety of partners that are more likely to align with that lifestyle so that fewer emotional faux-pas occur.
When You're Ready To Have Some Fun After a Breakup
When you’ve experienced a heart-wrenching break-up, you’re probably not ready to jump into someone else’s arms quite so soon. At least not with your heart in it - not yet. You need time to re-center yourself and rediscover who you are and what you want to explore in life. Sometimes that might be a new bed buddy to fulfill your physical needs.
No strings sex can be a more comfortable arena to play around in, rather than allowing yourself to get hurt all over again by letting your heart jump ahead. Of course, your feelings or theirs might get stirred up eventually - no matter how hard you try to keep them quiet. Of course, continued open communication will help keep things clear between yourself and any partner. - even if it doesn’t go the way either of you wants it to go.
When You're "Just Exploring" Things
In our younger years, or when we are still working on finding ourselves and the life we want to have, we may not really be interested in getting married or being tied down to one person. You might not know what kind of person you’re even interested in.
The range of sexuality is extensive. That means there is a lot of room to explore and learn. The vast range of sexual identification and preference can be overwhelming when you’re just beginning to figure things out. The NSA route may allow you to focus on exploring things while you figure out what works best for you without hurting your potential partners.
You don’t want to lead people on, so be sure to communicate and encourage your partners to communicate their expectations too - even if you aren’t being romantically “serious,” it helps to take your casual sexual behavior seriously. And don’t forget the general sexual safety tips of consent and protection.
The Truth Is, Sometimes Sh*t Gets Complicated
The biggest reason that a no-strings-attached (NSA) relationship doesn’t always work is that one partner can start to develop deeper feelings or desires for the connection. This desire can grow a more profound need for their partner that might not be matched. When both people in the situation are not on board with the sex-only status, this can cause resentment, jealousy, fighting, and ultimately (in its own way), become a model of an unhappy and faltering relationship replete with arguments and lack of sex.
This one-sided emotional development is probably one of the most significant risks in engaging or attempting to engage in casual sex. Sometimes, one partner cannot keep it casual at all. This can be incredibly awkward if the non-emotional partner has no apparent issue moving on when the situation becomes more complicated.
It at least hurts a bit more when the disappointment of losing the companionship isn’t shared as strongly. But that’s also informed consent in the most practical sense. A part of life, in general, is that we all have different goals and desires - and it’s just hard to find your perfect match - NSA or not. By agreeing to participate in NSA - or even the early stages of any dating scene - one-sided emotions are a standard risk.
The Surprising Facts About No Strings Attached Relationships
The truth is, there are too many variables between individuals and their personal preferences in relationship styles to really give a concrete answer one way or the other. Some people who have no need to be tied down romantically or emotionally - NSA relationships can work in some cases where the communication is kept high, and both partners stay on the same page.
For some others who may need to get over a bad break-up, engaging in a sex-only relationship may help you to get back on the horse in a manner of speaking. NSA can also be helpful when it comes to experimenting with new kinds of sexuality and finding new kinks while still maintaining a safe emotional distance from something that can hurt if it gets too emotional and ends too quickly.
So, is it possible to have a no-strings-attached relationship? Yes, absolutely. Can it be maintained long-term? It depends on who you are, what you find satisfying in your life, the ways that your partner(s) feel about the situation you are offering, and how the relationship runs its own course.
The possibilities are really endless - and all the happy endings are up to you and how you live your life. You have to decide what is best for you at every point in your life, every day. NSA is great for some, temporary for others, and just out of the question for others still. We leave it to you to discover what’s best for you.
I ask having a NSA attached relationship with someone that I formerly was with an actual relationship with. I am trying not to have any feelings but it’s hard. I just keep remembering that he hurt me before and it took a long time for my feelings to go away but they were gone so maybe this will actually work. For now we’re having a fantastic time and I hope to keep it this way
I am not for the ‘no strings attached’ lifestyle. For me, for 1, I don’t like sharing. Never have. I prefer a committed relationship and being able to spice up the life within reason. That works out for my spouse and I. When you feel the same way about it that makes it work.
Yes you can have a NSA relationship. I have been in one for over 3 years. We have both been damaged by others and openingly communicate all the time. We have crazy, fulfilling sex only with each other. Fantasys are an ongoing thing. We talk about life, are kind, caring, honest, and trusting of one another. Yes there are feelings, but not ones of interference of each other’s life. NO DRAMA. I have never in my life had as many, nor the type of orgasms this man gives me. In return he has the ability to hold back from coming for a very long time, and ending with his own strong orgasms.
Yes I miss the cuddling, going out in public together, e ct that a regular relationship has, BUT, I don’t miss the drama with all that.
Each visit we play for about 5 hours, that includes talking/sharing of our lives first. Nothing is quick! He will eat my pussy for 20 minutes causing me to get so wet that the next thing ,after he gets his cock sucked anyway he wants, is pure ecstasy when he enters me.
Each time is very different and fulfilling. I am so glad I have all this! I am 64 he is 54!😁
I feel so blessed to have this friend with benefits!
No strings attached can work for many years without complications as long as both parties are open. I have been in one on and off for over 20 years. Yes I do have feelings for my sex partner but not ones that make complications. We have open conversations about sex as well as daily life.
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