Mindful Masturbation Guide (+ Download Our Mindful Masturbation Playlist!)

When you think of masturbating, for most people it is a quick-release sort of event that is usually over as fast as you can say “self-pleasure”. A little bit of build-up, then a quick climax, and it’s over but in reality, masturbation is a form of self-care. It has many benefits aside from sexual pleasure including helping ease pain, improving sleep, and more!

At times, it can feel impossible to find time for practicing self-care. We recommend putting it on the calendar and scheduling it as a meeting you really can't cancel, incorporating small acts of mindful release and relaxation, and really prioritizing your pleasure.

What is mindful masturbation?

Mindful masturbation is different. It is all about taking things slow—like meditation—to allow yourself to unwind, focus on your self-pleasure, what gets you off, explore all your senses, and find new ways to enjoy your body.

In a sense, it is like bringing a mindfulness practice to your solo sex routine and experiencing self-pleasure in a new way. It is about approaching masturbation through the lens of mindfulness, exploration, curiosity, self-love, and patience.

The Importance of Mindful Masturbation

Mindful masturbation helps reduce stress and anxiety, and tunes you into your senses and pleasure, so you can just slow down and get into the moment.

It allows us to connect to our body without judgment through self-love and learn how to build and kindle deep desire, thus raising our libido.

It allows us to get out of our heads, turn off that inner critic, and just relish in the sensations of pleasure—for pleasure’s sake alone.

Download Our Mindful Masturbation Playlist:

Don't forget to leave a comment with your favorite mindful masturbation song!

Ways to Explore Mindful Masturbation

Here are a few ways you can try out mindful masturbation with yourself.

No Goals

The goal of mindful masturbation is that there is no goal. It is not about achieving orgasm or rushing to finish but experimenting with pleasure. The idea is to become embodied in the practice of self-pleasuring and to enjoy the sensuality of the experience. So go with the flow!

No Porn

If you usually use porn to get off, then try not using it for your mindfulness self-pleasuring. Why? If you are focusing on porn, you are not focusing on your own body. This allows you to find out what your body likes, rather than just your mind—and your eyeballs!

Awaken Your Senses

One way to explore this practice is to awaken all your senses. Trying various ways of touching yourself, exploring erogenous zones you haven’t tried pleasuring before, and tuning in. You can try things like scented products, or essential oils, lighting candles, playing music, or even using mirror play to explore your genitals visually—all ways to arouse the various senses.

Try New Ways to Self-Pleasure

While most people do the same old thing every time because it is tried and true, try something a bit different. Masturbating the same way every time can put you in a rut. Exploring new ways to pleasure yourself creates fresh neuro pathways in the brain, so you can eroticize a different way to experience orgasm. You could explore nipplegasms, anal pleasure, G-spot, P-spot, cervical orgasms, and other forms of self-stimulation. Use your creativity and think outside of the box!

Practice Self-Love

Self-pleasure is about self-love. With mindful masturbation, you can practice being kind, loving, and giving to yourself. I know, it sounds hokey, but self-love is important for self-esteem and helps you to feel loved and supported. Love yourself first, with compassion, to keep anxiety and depression away. Self-love helps us let go of perfectionism, working too hard, and imposter syndrome, so we can practice self-forgiveness and quiet our inner critic.

Teasing or Edging

Teasing is when you arouse yourself to build up sexual energy and arousal, like foreplay. Edging takes that one step further, by teasing to almost the point of orgasm, then backing away, starting again, and so on, without release to prolong the pleasure. You could make a game of this a see how long you can last!

Deep Breathing

Breathing is practiced in meditation and can also be used in masturbation (or sex) as a way to slow down or speed up the excitement phase of orgasm. Slow breathing allows you to deepen and slow down, whereas faster breathing, like the Breath of Fire, which is practiced in Tantra, speeds up your erotic stimulation. Some people can even achieve mind-gasms, or what is called breath and energy orgasms, using breathing techniques.

Prioritize Your Pleasure - Even With A Busy Schedule

Book some time off for yourself even with your busy schedule and practice some self-loving.

Ways to do this could include:

• Stick post-it notes around the house to remind you to do “self-care”
• Instead of Netflix and Chill, have some special self-pleasure and chill time
• Turn your phone on do not disturb and have a little self-pleasure break
• Schedule 1 hour or more each week for mindful masturbation and stick to it
• Get sexy with yourself in a masturbation safe place
• Camp out in front of the fireplace and get all hot and bothered
• Plan a date night with yourself!
  

How to Do Mindful Masturbation

Here are some twelve steps for mindful masturbation.

1. Set aside 20 minutes to 1 hour or more and set a timer, so you don’t cheat and end it early.
2. Set the mood with a comfy, cozy, sexy space. Add candles, music, scents, and satiny fabrics to indulge all your senses!
3. Gather all your play stuff, including lube, pillows, blankets, mirror, and whatever you think you will need.
4. Get naked!
5. Close your eyes and begin to breathe deeply to relax. You may even want to play a meditation audio to get you more mindful.
6. Begin exploring your body. Use massage oil for a sensual touch. Try other things like faux fur, feathers, massage candles, or, whatever flips your switch.
7. Tune into the sense of pleasure and allow yourself to linger on each touch. Try different types of strokes and various parts of the body, including non-erogenous zones.
8. Remember to keep breathing as deeply as you can.
9. Release sounds of pleasure to heighten the experience.
10. Grind your hips, undulate your body, and let the erotic energy move through you.
11. When you do get your genitals, try avoiding the clitoris or penis head (or whatever spot gets you off) for a bit, and circle it without touching. Try other ways to pleasure yourself, instead of old faithful.
12. Surrender to pleasure.

Remember, that self-pleasure is a gift of love to yourself, so treat yourself special!

Products We Love for Your Next Mindful Masturbation Sesh…

Here are some hand-curated products that are sure to get you started with mindful masturbation and holiday bliss!

Blindfolds

Blindfolds are a great way to get more embodied with your other senses, as it removes the sense of sight, thus heightening the others. And you don’t need a partner to use one on yourself. The Dark Amour Black Out Blindfold allows you to tune out your surroundings and focus on your pleasure.

Sensory Toys

Lace, silk, fantasy play. This Lace Bondage Kit is the perfect sex kit to focus on exploring your body and engaging in fantasy masturbation sessions.

Arousal Lubes

Turn up your libido with the TooTimid Clitoral Arousal Gel intensifies arousal during sex and masturbation with a gentle cooling and tingling sensation.

Erotic Massage Candles

The Jelique Mood Candles - Soy Massage Candle with Pheromones are scented soy massage oil candles available in lots of sexy and sweet aromas including Berry, Black Cherry, Vanilla, Passion Fruit, as well as Strawberries and Champagne. 

Arousal Gels

Heat things up with this Warm & Buzzy Clitoral Cream that both warms and tingles, for a passion party with Me, Myself, and I.

Pheromones

The Pheromone Perfume Roll-On is an aphrodisiac delight, infused with pheromone oils that tantalize your senses in three enticing scents that will fit any mood you're in.

Wand Massagers

Enjoy powerful vibrations to soothe aching muscles and stimulate your erogenous zones with the Desire Rechargeable Massage Wand that is perfect for your inner Vixen.

Masturbators

The BJ Stroker with built-in cock ring helps you build your endurance as you build your orgasm. Or, try the Realistic Pussy Stroker if you want a toy that is ultra-realistic.

Glass Toys

The Glass G-Spot Massager is perfect for temperature play, with a rounded head that will massage your G-spot just right.

Clitoral Stimulators

The Handheld Clit Massager, Rechargeable Air Pulse Stimulator, and, Charming Clit Buddy are all perfect for clitoral stimulation.

Thrusting Rabbits

The Thrusting Rabbit Vibrator is a famous toy that does it all. Vibrates, pulses, rotates, and thrusts, all in one for a perfect treat!

G-spot & P-spot Toys

The Lollipop style G-Spot Massager for vagina-owners is uniquely shaped to contour to your body, with a silicone head and raised textures for added sensations with every thrust. The Prostate Curve Dual Ring - Remote Control Vibrating Prostate Massager for prostate-owners features built-in cock rings, added vibrations, and a curved P-spot pleasure massager. 

Vibrating Dildos

The #1 Thick Vibrating Dildo is a great dildo for solo play, featuring a suction cup base for hands-free play, realistic sculpting and feel, as well as vibrating options.

We hope you have enjoyed this Mindful Masturbation guide to get you feeling relaxed and Zen!