5 Popular Bondage Items & How to Use Them

Over the last few years bondage has really been taking on a new popularity among couples. We may be seeing this growing popularity as a result of the attractiveness and mainstreaming of books and movies such as the Netflix series called Bondage, or it might just be that there is some evolution occurring in sexuality.

Either way, bondage is no longer viewed as the odd and scary sexual practice, but instead it is becoming something enticing and fun to try for many couples. When people start to get into bondage play they often want to know what items are good and fun to have around. Here are 5 of the most popular items and how to use them. Enjoy!

1. Masks & Blindfolds

There is no more essential item to begin any type of bondage play than a Blindfold. Sensation play and sensory deprivation is extremely important in bondage play. The idea behind blindfolding your partner is to give them the gift of the ultimate sensations. You create a super heightened sense of feeling because when one sensation is taken away, the others become more acute.

How to Use a Blindfold or Mask: Find a mask, like the Plush Lace Blindfold below, that will completely take away your lover’s sense of sight. Once they are completely blind, lay them down on the bed and tease them with differing sensations – a soft piece of silk, a flirty feather, an ice cube or some hot sex wax. Their body will react strongly to every touch, will shiver at every fingertip graze and will arch to meet your hands.

2. Restraints

Of course the first thing that many people think about with regard to bondage is actual bondage which means Restraints. The glory of restraints is that there are so many different types. Handcuffs, Bondage Tape, Rope, Restraint Systems for the bed or the door – any and all types are a must for bondage play. Start slowly if you are at all intimidated or scared about how to proceed with bondage play. A simple set of wrist or ankle cuffs will get you headed in the right direction.

How to Use Restraints: First, pick the restraints you'd like to use, such as the set of First Timer Handcuffs shown below. Discuss with your lover exactly how restrained you would like to be and what are the rules or restrictions to follow. Make sure that your lover is comfortable and that the restraints are light and not too tight. A good place to start is to restrain your partner to the headboard with their hands above their head. Then, once secured, you can use a blindfold to take away their sense of sight and go from there. When your lover feels that confined sensation combined with the sexual sensations of being touched, kissed and teased they will experience a new level of sexuality.

3. Whips, Paddles & Riding Crops

While not all bondage scenarios utilize a Whip paddle, flogger or any other “punishment” type item, they are extremely popular for both their pleasure and pain offerings. Many couples find a strong desire to “punish” their partner and their partner gets extreme pleasure from experiencing pain. If this is something that you are both interested in, then the next step is deciding if you want a bold instrument like a paddle or a softer, more utilitarian object like a flogger. Riding crops are often under-utilized items because people do not realize the pleasure that can be rendered from that small little leathery end.

How to Use a Whip or Paddle: Once you embark upon any type of pain play it is extremely important that you talk with your partner about the dos and don’ts of the experience. There should always be a safe word or a way to indicate the desire to stop. Then, once you are ready GO SLOWLY! You never want to simply spank your partner as hard as you can. The idea is to gradually get used to the sensations and find that place where you both get the most gratification from it. Also, remember to experiment with the light side of pain play – use the soft side of the paddle (such as the Leather BDSM Paddle shown below) to run over your lover’s skin, tap the riding crop gently on their nipples, clit or penis shaft, dangle tethers of a flogger over your lover’s body. Experiment and have fun.

4. Vibrators, Dildos, Bullets & Prostate Massagers 

While you may think that these are standard sex toy fair (and, they are) they are also very important to bondage play. Bondage is about sensations and control - being controlled and controlling. When you have your lover bound and blindfolded you need plenty of options for stimulation. Vibrators and Bullets work wonderfully for both males and females as they provide targeted stimulation. Dildos and Prostate Massagers are also great additions to the bondage bedroom.

How to Use Vibrating Toys: While you could quite possibly be using these items for solo play, they are completely different when used during a bondage-type situation. While your lover is restrained in some manner (and, preferably, blindfolded) you will use the vibrator, like the Discreet Silver Bullet shown below, to stimulate their erogenous zones. A slow tease across the chest, over the nipples, down the penis, on the balls – this brings foreplay to moreplay. Then, if your partner has consented, penetration play while being restrained is extremely intense. Having your partner take control and stimulate you in this extremely intimate manner really takes it up a few notches.

5. Spreader Bars & Advanced Restraints

Not every couple has just started out and some have embraced bondage in their bedrooms and as such are ready for some advanced play options. Restraining systems can be extremely complex and really, really fun to explore. Spreader Bars (attach to the ankles to “spread” the legs), Over The Door Restraints, or even hog tie restraints will place your partner in a completely vulnerable position during play.

How to Use Spreader Bars and Advanced Restraints: Once you and your partner have discussed using more advanced restraining systems things can get really fun! When dealing with spreader bars and restraints the most important thing is to listen to your partner. Spreader bars, like the Bondage Position Spreader Bar With Cuffs shown below, can be used on the ankles or wrists. 

What's Your Favorite Type Of Bondage Gear? Let Us Know!